I'm not an overly sensitive person--one who is easily offended. In fact, I've always kind of considered that to be one of my good characteristics. I can laugh at myself pretty easily, acknowledge my faults, and let comments roll off my back. Until this weekend . . . .
Somehow in the course of three days, I've become unusually sensitive. I've walked away from several conversations feeling wronged and offended by something someone has said. I spend the days trying to decipher how I should react to the offense. In one case, I spoke hastily in the moment and said something hurtful back. In another case, I fumed privately for hours. So, here I am at the end of hours (two days now) feeling unsettled, angry, hurt, and ready to do what I do best--bury the problem until something else brings it up again, and the process starts all over.
I think I'll try something different this time . . . blogging. I'm not going to regale you with the details of the "alleged offense." I'm simply going to skip to the part where I'm standing face to face with a decision. What do I do with these hurt feelings? Where do I go with the anger I'm feeling? In a lucid moment I realize that I've managed to "take up an offense" and that the Bible addresses this very issue. I pull up Bible Gateway because it works better than my memory at the moment, and type in "taking offense" and find a verse. Whether it's the one I was originally thinking of or not, it's the one I need to hear: "A man's wisdom gives him patience; it is his glory to overlook an offense" (Proverbs 19:11 NIV). Or as The Message puts it: "Smart people know how to hold their tongue; it is their grandeur to forgive and forget."
I immediately feel the pang of conviction. In one scenario, I chose foolishly not to hold my tongue, and venomous words spewed out. In the second situation, I held my tongue, but spent hours ruminating over what I wish I had said. Both times I sat around licking my wounds, ignoring the fact that there was indeed another way--a grander way, a glorious way, a God-way to deal with these emotions. How do I find the good and the glory in this ugly situation? Forgive. Overlook. And I can because He shows me how. He who had true cause to take up offense laid it down in the form of His life. He overlooks the great multitude of my offenses (not just one little sentence someone said) and forgives and forgets. The grit of the cross becomes the glory-road. I want to grab hold of that glory-road and ride it right out of my anger, bitterness, and hurt. Hopefully, next time I'm "offended," I'll get on this road without taking an all-day detour first.
Somehow in the course of three days, I've become unusually sensitive. I've walked away from several conversations feeling wronged and offended by something someone has said. I spend the days trying to decipher how I should react to the offense. In one case, I spoke hastily in the moment and said something hurtful back. In another case, I fumed privately for hours. So, here I am at the end of hours (two days now) feeling unsettled, angry, hurt, and ready to do what I do best--bury the problem until something else brings it up again, and the process starts all over.
I think I'll try something different this time . . . blogging. I'm not going to regale you with the details of the "alleged offense." I'm simply going to skip to the part where I'm standing face to face with a decision. What do I do with these hurt feelings? Where do I go with the anger I'm feeling? In a lucid moment I realize that I've managed to "take up an offense" and that the Bible addresses this very issue. I pull up Bible Gateway because it works better than my memory at the moment, and type in "taking offense" and find a verse. Whether it's the one I was originally thinking of or not, it's the one I need to hear: "A man's wisdom gives him patience; it is his glory to overlook an offense" (Proverbs 19:11 NIV). Or as The Message puts it: "Smart people know how to hold their tongue; it is their grandeur to forgive and forget."
I immediately feel the pang of conviction. In one scenario, I chose foolishly not to hold my tongue, and venomous words spewed out. In the second situation, I held my tongue, but spent hours ruminating over what I wish I had said. Both times I sat around licking my wounds, ignoring the fact that there was indeed another way--a grander way, a glorious way, a God-way to deal with these emotions. How do I find the good and the glory in this ugly situation? Forgive. Overlook. And I can because He shows me how. He who had true cause to take up offense laid it down in the form of His life. He overlooks the great multitude of my offenses (not just one little sentence someone said) and forgives and forgets. The grit of the cross becomes the glory-road. I want to grab hold of that glory-road and ride it right out of my anger, bitterness, and hurt. Hopefully, next time I'm "offended," I'll get on this road without taking an all-day detour first.
Therefore, as God's chosen people, holy and dearly loved, clothe yourselves with compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness and patience. Bear with each other and forgive whatever grievances you may have against one another. Forgive as the Lord forgave you. And over all these virtues put on love, which binds them all together in perfect unity.
Colossians 3:12-14
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